Handling relationships while dealing with SS

As a relatively newly divorced 40-something, I am dealing with a new dilemma... when do you tell new people in your life about this. What do you tell them and how much? I occurred to me that others may have the same issues.

I don't just mean with new people, though. I've noticed that I keep things from certain family members so as not to worry them... parents, my son, etc.... though I keep others in the loop "just in case". I'm curious as to what you all do and how you feel about it.

I had the same problem, I didn’t know what to tell people. But I did want them to know because I hate it when people keep things from me. So I made my brother tell everyone and then anyone who wanted to ask me about it could and anyone who didn’t want to talk about it didn’t have to. I haven’t had any new people in my life yet since being diagnosed though, I feel like that would be hard.

I like that you had your brother tell them which gave everyone options… I wouldn't have thought of that but its a good idea. I'm just now starting to let people at work know…its taken me almost a year to feel ok with saying anything outside of the "need to know" people. As far as new people, it is hard. Until now I haven't had anyone new get close enough where I thought about telling them. Its odd….

I agree, there are people out there who are so good at “owning” their illnesses, they are proud to talk about it and share their stories and don’t seem to worry about judgment or anything. I so admire those people, I am definitely not one of them

I'm not either… I don't want to get lost in the disease having people watching me to see how I am. Its easier to stay strong by maintaining privacy. I dunno…

Funny…. I had told the person I've been dating lately about it (its been about 6 wks so it was time). I was touched that he googled it and did some reading trying to understand it but in a funny way it annoyed me that what is out there makes it sound like a little annoyance with dry eyes and not much more.

Oh I completely agree!! When I told my boss she googled it too and she was like “so do you need a humidifier or something then?” Dry eyes and dry mouth have actually been the least of my problems

That is so the truth….then what? You risk losing favor with a boss by giving her the harsh realities? LOL. That's my problem in the nutshell, whether its work, certain family members or friends.

I don’t tell people I work with or do business with because it makes me feel weak “vulnerable”. I try to stay strong at work, however all the water I drink is so noticeable.
For family I pick and choose because my parents get too upset and some relatives cause drama.
If I was going into a new relationship and I saw it heading in a good way than I would be honest so that the relationship starts out knowing why today I can do this or that and tomorrow I cant. Or why I am not feeling well enough to go out, let’s just stay home and watch a movie.
I like the idea of telling the Brother!!!